Should I Include My Deceased Sibling on the Common App? A Journey Through the Labyrinth of College Applications
So, you’re applying to college, and you’re staring at the dreaded “Siblings” section of the Common App. You’ve got a million things on your mind โ “Will my GPA be good enough?”, “What if my essay isn’t perfect?”, and now… “Should I include my deceased sibling?” It’s a question that can make even the most confident applicant feel like they’re navigating through a labyrinth of conflicting advice. Well, buckle up, because we’re about to dive into the murky waters of college applications and find some answers.
The Short Answer: There’s no “right” answer. It’s a personal decision that depends on several factors, including your individual circumstances and how much you want to share about your family history.
The Long Answer: Let’s dissect this question layer by layer, shall we?
Why Does the Common App Even Ask About Siblings?
The Common App asks about siblings for a few reasons. First, colleges use this information for demographic purposes. They want to understand the diversity of their student body and how various family dynamics might influence student experiences.
Second, it can shed light on potential familial connections to the institution. If you’re applying to your parents’ or siblings’ alma mater, your “legacy status” might be considered โ a subtle nod to “we’re practically family already!”
The Deceased Sibling Dilemma:
Now, let’s get back to the elephant in the room โ the deceased sibling. This is where things get complicated.
The “What If” Scenarios:
- Scenario 1: The sibling was a significant part of your life. If your sibling’s passing had a profound impact on you, you might feel compelled to mention it, especially if it shaped your values or influenced your academic aspirations. However, be mindful that this can open a Pandora’s box of personal details you might not be ready to share.
- Scenario 2: The sibling passed away when you were very young. You barely remember them, and their passing doesn’t hold a heavy weight in your life. In this case, you might feel uncomfortable listing them.
- Scenario 3: You’re unsure what to do. This is where a little soul-searching comes in. Ask yourself: Does mentioning them contribute to a full picture of who you are? Would it help the admissions committee understand your background and experiences?
Navigating the Emotional Terrain:
This is where the “personal” part of the equation really takes center stage. It’s okay to feel conflicted. It’s okay to be unsure. It’s okay to cry a little (we won’t judge).
Tips for Making a Decision:
- Talk it out. Share your thoughts and feelings with trusted friends, family members, or a college counselor. They can offer a fresh perspective and help you weigh the pros and cons.
- Consider your comfort level. You don’t have to disclose anything that makes you uncomfortable.
- Focus on the present. Your application should showcase who you are now, not dwell on the past.
- Think about the bigger picture. If mentioning your deceased sibling causes emotional distress or distracts from your overall application, it might be best to omit it.
Alternatives to Listing Your Deceased Sibling:
- Additional information section. If you feel compelled to address your sibling’s passing, you can do so in the “Additional Information” section of the Common App. This gives you more space to elaborate on your experiences and how they’ve shaped you.
- Essay. If you choose to write about your sibling in your college essay, do so with sensitivity and focus on the positive impact they had on your life. Avoid dwelling on the tragedy of their passing.
- Don’t mention it at all. Remember, it’s perfectly acceptable to simply leave the “Siblings” section blank.
The Bottom Line:
The choice is yours. There’s no right or wrong answer. The most important thing is that you feel comfortable and confident with your decision.
Remember: The Common App is just one piece of the college application puzzle. Your academic achievements, extracurricular activities, and personal qualities will ultimately play a much larger role in the admissions process.
Need Help Navigating the College Application Labyrinth?
If you need further guidance or have questions about navigating the Common App, don’t hesitate to reach out! We’re here to help you navigate this exciting (and sometimes stressful) journey. At JobLoving, we’re a community dedicated to empowering students and helping them reach their full potential.